What Are The Benefits Of Co-Parenting For The Children?

Divorced parents often say co-parenting is one of the most challenging issues in their changed relationship. In most cases, children suffer problems and trauma from divorce because they feel torn between their parents. However, if you can establish an effective co-parenting routine with your ex-spouse, your children can prosper despite the divorce.

Learn below about co-parenting benefits and how to co-parent effectively. Then, if you have questions about child custody and divorce, talk to the Chicago child custody attorneys Gordon Perlut, LLC, today.

Co-Parenting Benefits

While working with your ex-spouse in a co-parenting arrangement can be stressful, the arrangement has many benefits for the kids:

• They feel more secure: When the children feel the love of both parents regularly, they adjust faster and better to the divorce. They also have an increase in self-esteem.
• More consistency: Co-parenting usually means more consistent discipline, rules, and rewards between the two homes. Children better understand what to expect and what each parent expects from them.
• Better problem-solving: When the kids see parents working together to solve problems, they will often learn to problem-solve better themselves.
• They have healthier adult examples: If the kids see you cooperating with the other parent, they learn a positive life pattern to emulate.
• Better emotional and mental health: Children who experience conflict between quarreling spouses are more likely to have mental health issues, including anxiety and depression.

How to Co-Parent Harmoniously

Put Aside Your Anger and Hurt Feelings

Co-parenting effectively with your ex means putting aside your negative emotions about them. One of the most challenging parts of co-parenting is putting your feelings aside. But it is not possible to co-parent well without doing so.

Also, remember to focus on the children and not on your personal feelings. For example, if you feel anger when you see your ex-partner, put your children’s best interests at the top of your mind.

Keep The Children Out Of The Middle

Once you put aside your feelings about your ex, next you should avoid putting the kids in the middle of the situation. Here’s how:

Don’t use your children to convey messages: If the children give messages to your ex-partner, it puts them in the middle of the conflict. Contact your ex directly instead.

Keep contentious issues to yourself: Do not say negative things about your ex-spouse to the children. Also, never make them feel like they need to choose between you.

Enhance Communication With The Other Parent

Co-parenting effectively also means communicating effectively with your ex-spouse. Before you contact your ex, think about how your actions will affect your children.

You also can improve communication with your ex-partner by:

• Setting a professional tone: Look at the relationship with your ex as a business transaction. Talk to them like you would to a co-worker.
• Making requests instead of demands: If you need your ex to pick up the children earlier, ask politely instead of saying, ‘I need you to pick up the kids sooner.’
• Listening: Make sure you listen to the other parent and that you have heard their point of view.

Talk to Chicago Child Custody Attorneys Today

Unless your family has experienced domestic violence or another major issue, co-parenting is often the best way to ensure the children’s needs are met. While joint custody can be challenging if you have a problematic relationship with your ex-spouse, both parents should work together for the children.

If you are divorcing and child custody is a central issue, the Chicago child custody attorneys at Gordon Perlut, LLC, are ready to help. Our attorneys know how to advocate for your parental rights aggressively and will give you the best opportunity to have your voice heard. We also serve the communities of Evanston, Des Plaines, Park Ridge, Mount Prospect, Elk Grove Village, Glenview, Niles, Prospect Heights, Northbrook, Wheeling, Winnetka, Arlington Heights, Riverside, Rosemont, Rolling Meadows, and Wilmette contact our Chicago child custody attorneys at (312) 360-0250.